The questions you ask yourself determine both your mindset and your perception of the world around you. In fact, your internal questions influence every decision you make—good or bad.
Here’s a simple example of how your questions influence your thinking. Let’s say you’ve decided to buy a new four-wheel-drive vehicle. You probably ask yourself, “Which one should I get?” Now that your mind is focused on four-wheel-drive vehicles, you can be sure that the next time you are on the road, you will notice Jeeps, Explorers, and Range Rovers in record numbers. You will also start to see articles and advertisements featuring these types of vehicles, and you may even discover that some of your friends and acquaintances own one.… >>> READ MORE >>> →
Anger is a natural human emotion. We all get angry from time to time, and we all have the right to express our emotions appropriately. Unfortunately, anger is often the emotion that ruins relationships. That’s because anger can sting—it can come across as irrational, aggressive, mean-spirited, or even manipulative. It’s an emotion that can quickly push others away.
Therefore, the key is to control your anger rather than have it control you. When you do that, you can express your emotions in a healthy way and not destroy relationships in the process. One of the best ways to take control of your emotions is to focus on some reflective questions. When you take a moment and engage in reflective questioning, … >>> READ MORE >>> →
Conquering fear is indeed possible. Doing so is important, because fear and negativity go hand-in-hand. In fact, fear is often a by-product of negative thoughts. Unfortunately, we have an innate capacity for fear.
Well, fear not. This tip will enable you to face your fears head-on. And this is the best way for conquering fear once and for all!
In 1919 psychologist John B. Watson conducted a controversial experiment to see whether fear could be learned.
A young boy he named “Little Albert” was shown different creatures, including a rat. At first, Albert showed no fear of the rat.
Then Watson paired the exposure with a harsh sound that scared the little boy. Soon, Little Albert would react with fear … >>> READ MORE >>> →
Anger management is an important skill to master these days. Have you ever tried to have a conversation with an emotional person? If you have, you probably realized it was an act of futility. This stress management tip will help you take the sting out of such future conflicts and be a master at anger management.
Regardless of the person’s age or why they are upset, when an emotionally charged person is seeing red, is angry, or is overly obstinate, trying to reason with them is fruitless.
The smart approach to diffuse the situation is to take a break. Therefore, suggest it. Set a time to return. It can be as short as two minutes. It’s as simple as saying, … >>> READ MORE >>> →
Have you ever felt like you’ve been the victim of an emotional hijacking? In other words, have your emotions ever overridden your brain in a particular situation? Perhaps you acted from your emotions and later realized you could have handled the situation better.
The following story a reader sent me about her realization of her own emotional hijacking may ring true for you too:
“When I read your recommendations in handling discipline problems, I can agree. But when it comes to implementing them at the time of need, I find myself overcome with anger and forget your recommendations. In other words, theoretically, I agree with your recommendations of behavior but when it comes to practice I have to deal with … >>> READ MORE >>> →
Although we all encounter experiences that prompt feelings that lead to emotional stress, these feelings need not control us. Realize that I’m not talking about stopping emotions you feel about a situation. You cannot stop an emotion directly!
You may have heard someone say, “You shouldn’t feel that way.” But the person cannot help it. I repeat to emphasize the point: No human can directly stop an emotion. That’s why emotional stress occurs. However, there is a way—a rock solid way—to control emotions, as shared by my experience below. I suggest that you visualize the scenario so it will go into long-term memory.
One day when I was an elementary school principal, a kindergarten teacher contacted the office for assistance … >>> READ MORE >>> →
You can utilize three approaches to discipline yourself to handle anger. They are: (1) You can let the emotion express itself (and thereby become a victim of it); (2) You can inhibit it (and live with the stress); or (3) You can control it by redirecting your attention.
The most successful approach is the third alternative. Redirecting your thinking controls any emotion because emotion always follows cognition. Your self-talk or thinking—along with input from your senses (what you see, hear, taste, smell, or touch)—becomes your awareness. Therefore, redirecting your thoughts automatically controls your emotions because emotion follows your attention.
This is not new. My grandmother told my mother to clean the stove when she was angry. Of course, what … >>> READ MORE >>> →