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Effectiveness

Reducing Perfectionism

On August 24, 2012 / Effectiveness

When young people perform academic-type tasks and are corrected before obtaining feelings of empowerment or success, they become candidates for discouragement.

A friend of mine related an incident that occurred at the birthday party of his young daughter. After his daughter opened a present he had just given her, my friend asked, cajoled, and finally coerced his daughter into sharing her new toy with the other children. It is hard for a child to share or open to others that which the child does not yet “own.”

The same principle holds true in learning. Young people need to feel some degree of ownership or success in performing a task—or have a feeling that they are capable of it—before correction becomes … >>>

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Learning and Expectations

On August 23, 2012 / Effectiveness, Learning

If you ask someone the key to success in real estate, they’ll tell you, “Location, location, location.” In the field of education, a critical component of the superior teacher is “Expectation, expectation, expectation.”

We can see evidence of this in Rainier Scholars located in Seattle, Washington. Founded by Robert Hurlbut, Ranier Scholars is a project for low-income students. It recruits 5^th graders who are highly motivated and has them attend full-time summer school plus weekend classes. The goal is to shepherd them through college graduation.

Drego Little, one of the teachers, says that he visualizes his young students as future doctors, city councilmen, and other responsible, successful grownups. He explains, “I treat them as if they are going to … >>>

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Project Positive Expectations

On August 22, 2012 / Effectiveness

Attitude is the mind’s paintbrush; it can color any situation. The teacher who says, “This is a very important test. Be careful,” paints a negative picture that shakes confidence. Saying, “This is a very important test and I know you can handle it and do well,” paints a positive picture.

Which would you rather hear when you walk into a restaurant: “I can’t seat you for thirty minutes” or “In thirty minutes I will have a wonderful table for you”? The result is the same, but the perception is different. The child who wets his bed conjures up one image when the parent says, “Don’t wet your bed tonight” and a completely different picture when the youngster hears, “Let’s see … >>>

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The One Word Teachers and Parents Should Avoid

On August 17, 2012 / Effectiveness

Be cautious of “Why?” questions. Asking, “Why?” is one of the most frequently used and ineffective questions. It not only has an accusatory overtone, but it also blocks communications because it prompts negative feelings. Let’s prove the point. Say the following question aloud so you can hear yourself:

“Why are you doing that?”

Notice that when you asked this question, your voice pitch rose higher and your volume increased. Also, notice the effect on your emotions when you asked, this “Why?” question.

Now, say the following aloud so you can hear yourself:

“What do you think we should do now?”

Notice that the emotional aspect was reduced because the aim was toward a resolution rather than on the cause. The … >>>

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Cooperation rather than Coercion

On July 13, 2012 / Effectiveness

No Ordinary Time – Franklin and Eleanor Roosevelt: The Home Front in World War II by Doris Kearns Goodwin is a wonderful historical read.

FDR’s mobilization of the United States in helping the Allies and preparing the United States for war before our entry into World War II was a tremendous challenge. How did he bring industry and labor together? How did he convince industry to change their product from civilian goods to armaments?

The answer is articulated on page 55, “Roosevelt’s stress on cooperation rather than coercion.”

FDR knew what influential leaders know, namely, that the art of influence is to induce a person to influence himself. Coercion never accomplishes this.

As Benjamin Franklin said to King George … >>>

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Self-talk and Stereotypes

On June 22, 2012 / Effectiveness

Myron Tribus states that there is no such thing as immaculate perception—that what you see is what you thought before you looked. This is particularly the case regarding stereotyping and perceptions, especially about ourselves.

If a student receives a below average score on a test, the self-talk may be, “I’m just not good in this subject.” On the other hand, the self-talk can be, “I guess I’ll have to study more next time.” The difference is in the student’s perception. A similar situation can be with stereotyping oneself. For example, a woman who believes that women do worse than men in math will tend to perform less well on math tests as a result. Notice that this comparison was … >>>

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Classroom Management and Motivation

On June 20, 2012 / Discipline, Effectiveness, Learning

A common confusion of teachers and school leaders is that classroom management and motivation are the same.

Successful classroom management does not create motivation to learn. More and more teachers complain about the apathy of students to put forth effort in their learning. However, a teacher can have the most effective classroom management but still not prompt student effort. The reason is that classroom management has nothing to do with student motivation. Classroom management has to do with what the teacher does—specifically, the procedures taught, practiced, and reinforced to ensure that students understand how to implement what has been taught.

Motivation, in contrast to making instruction efficient, is about making instruction effective. What does the teacher do to … >>>

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The Raise Responsibility System & Noise Levels

On October 25, 2011 / Effectiveness

I received the following communication:

“I’m a retired electrical engineer. I recently began working as a substitute teacher handling any subject from grade 3 up through grade 12.

“The biggest challenge is to keep the noise level down and the smart alecks from disrupting the class. Things have sure changed since I went to school!

“So I have approached the challenge by being strict. Smart alecks, mainly 12-year-old boys, end up standing facing the wall until they apologize for disrupting the class. I knew there had to be a better way, so I spent some time in the local library and discovered your book. I am going to teach 6th grade tomorrow and I plan to implement your suggestions in … >>>

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Smile When You Speak

On September 22, 2011 / Effectiveness

“You are never fully dressed without a smile,” sang Little Orphan Annie in the old Broadway musical. It turns out Annie may have been giving some shrewd advice.

Studies have repeatedly shown that people remember smiling faces better than neutral ones. Researchers at Duke University have found a physical explanation for the phenomenon.

Robert Cabeza and his colleagues “introduced” volunteers to a number of people by showing them a picture and telling them a name. Using Magnetic Resonance Imaging (MRI), the investigators found that both learning and recalling the names associated with smiling faces preferentially activated the orbitofrontal cortex, a processing area of the brain.

Although the studies are preliminary, it makes evolutionary sense that a smile would engender positive … >>>

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Tag Questions

On September 20, 2011 / Effectiveness

A tag question is simply a question offered quickly and nonchalantly at the end of a statement or observation. It encourages review of the previous communication. When using tag questions, you make a statement, then leave it up to the person you are talking with to think about what you have asked.

Tag questions in particular give teachers and parents a tool to help a young person review what has been said or done.The tag prompts an opportunity to have the young person reflect—without requiring an accounting to the adult.

Here are some examples of tag questions:

So you think that will help the situation, do you?

You meant that you can go to your friend’s house when you finished … >>>

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A Creative Procedure

On August 16, 2011 / Effectiveness

Although procedures are the foundational step to efficient instruction and reducing discipline problems, sometimes we forget to be creative in their establishment.

In some cases, the teacher might create a new CLASSROOM PROCEDURE to proactively deal with misbehavior from certain students. In other words, rather than reacting to the same type of misbehavior day after day, the teacher might restructure the environment more carefully in a way that would allow immature students to be more careful.

Here is an example posted on the Yahoo group Discipline Without Stress:

This year in our primary classroom, we have a number of students who find it difficult to maintain appropriate behaviour in the cramped quarters of the cloakroom at dismissal time. To deal … >>>

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Dealing with Risks

On August 4, 2011 / Effectiveness

If there is one area in our lives that many people struggle with, it is that of taking a risk. The reason is that risk creates fear, and fear prompts inaction.

Here is a simple and practical system to deal with risks.

Look at any situation where a decision needs to be made. It makes no difference what the decision is—be it taking a vacation, purchasing something, or taking some action.

Ask yourself three questions:

1. As a result of taking this action, what is the BEST thing that can happen?

Then flip the coin:
2. As a result of taking this action, what is the WORST thing that can happen?

Then use some moderation by asking,
3. What is … >>>

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Combating Negativity

On July 5, 2011 / Effectiveness

A reader wrote, “I try to stay positive and think of things I can do when faced with a challenge. I’m finding that negativity is contagious and a select few can really bring me down, making it hard for me to stay positive. Do you have any suggestions for how to deal with the naysayers at school?”

As you indicated, NEGATIVITY IS CONTAGIOUS. Combat it by being proactive. This is done by the simple truth that THE PERSON WHO ASKS THE QUESTION CONTROLS THE CONVERSATION.

Ask questions such as, “How is this conversation enhancing the enjoyment of our day?” “Is there anything else we could talk about so that we will leave feeling good rather than negative?”

Persevere! It can … >>>

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Eliciting vs. Imposing

On June 30, 2011 / Effectiveness

Perhaps of all the approaches I have discovered, the most simple yet most effective one is eliciting, in contrast to imposing.

The following are from notes taken by Joy Pelton after attending one of my presentations—used with her permission:

ELICIT a consequence; don’t impose it.

Don’t tell a student what is going to happen if. . . . Rather, REDIRECT by saying, “George, what do you suggest we do about this?” “What else?” “What else?” until George comes up with a consequence that you agree with. Then respond with, “I can live with that.”

PEOPLE DON’T ARGUE WITH THEIR OWN DECISIONS.

Two characteristics for changing behavior: (1) There needs to be an acknowledgment that a change is necessary and (2) … >>>

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The Three Most Effective Motivators

On June 23, 2011 / Effectiveness

I received the following communication:

First, I want to say that I have taught for 25 years and have never had to use rewards or punishment for discipline. However, I have moved to a new school where every teacher in the school uses the “pull your card” or “move your boat,” etc., resulting in punishments or rewards.

I have never had to do this but have been able to TEACH MY STUDENTS TO BEHAVE BECAUSE IT WAS IN THEIR BEST INTERESTS AND THE RIGHT THING TO DO. However, some of the children I am now teaching have no idea how to use self-discipline. They asked me to create a chart. I was ready to make up my own little chart … >>>

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Abraham Lincoln on Influence

On June 7, 2011 / Effectiveness

Forcing an issue often spoils the desired outcome.
—Abraham Lincoln

The old story of the salesman who lost a sale bears periodic repeating.

After he told his sales manager, “Well, I guess you can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink,” his boss replied, “Your job is not to make the horse drink; it’s to make him thirsty.”

The “Art of Influence” is to INDUCE PEOPLE TO INFLUENCE THEMSELVES.

Posing a provocative question that prompts the other person to reflect is the most successful approach for increasing your effectiveness.… >>>

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The Optimism Bias

On June 5, 2011 / Effectiveness

The June 6, 2011 issue of Time Magazine headlined an article “The Optimism Bias” (pp 40-46).

The article began, “We like to think of ourselves as rational creatures” and then gave the following definition: “The belief that the future will be much better than the past and present is known as the optimism bias.”

A key ingredient of optimism is hope because it keeps our minds at ease, lowers stress, and improves physical health.

The article relates optimism and hope to how memory may work: The core function of the memory system could be to imagine the future—to enable us to prepare for what has yet to come. The system is not designed to perfectly replay past events. It is … >>>

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Likability and Effectiveness

On May 5, 2011 / Effectiveness

Likability is the shortest path to believability, trust, and effectiveness.

It is also the easiest path to influence others.

It may be worthwhile to reflect on this one quality above others—the quality that prompts people to do what you would like them to do.

Three practices are most productive in this regard. They are (1) communicating in POSITIVE, rather than in negative, terms; (2) showing OPTIONS that are available; and (3) REFLECTING on how to overcome objections.… >>>

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