QUESTION:
I am a first-year home schooling mom. I have a self-motivated third grade boy who also has Sensory Integration Disorder. I also have a fifth grade girl who struggles with staying focused and would rather read all day.
My biggest struggle this year has been our morning routine. My daughter, who is very bright, has difficulty staying within the parameters of time set out for her. The routine set out is to be done in 1 1/2 hours. Many days this goes to two hours or more.
Her routine is written out for her step by step and I feel that it is very realistic. My desire is to start school at 8:00 a.m., but this rarely happens for her. She will use a timer to be able to limit her shower and eating time, but it is not enough to get us within the 1 1/2 hour limit. I am tempted to and have slipped into giving consequences, but they don’t last and are not effective. If you can offer any assistance in helping us achieve this goal for her, I am confident she will feel better about herself and our days overall will be more effective.
Thanks for your service to raising the quality of life in children’s lives.
Sincerely,
JoAnn
MY RESPONSE:
ELICIT from her a consequence that will help her help herself. ELICITING is the key. If you IMPOSE a consequence, she will have no ownership in it and, as you found, it will not be very effective.
Have her continually repeat to herself her new mantra:
If I follow my procedures, I will become ____________.
If I do not follow my procedures, my self-imposed consequences will be_____________?”
More information on this topic is available at http://marvinmarshall.com.
