There is an old story about the U.S.S. Enterprise that was traveling along the Eastern seaboard. It saw a light in front and thought that it was going to collide with the other ship. So the Enterprise sent a signal for the other ship to travel in a different direction. “We are the U.S.S. Enterprise and you are on our course. Please go south.”
A message came back, “We cannot move.”
A second message was sent. “We are the U.S.S. Enterprise. If you do not move, we will collide.”
Another message came back. “Sorry, we will not and cannot move.”
A last message was sent. “We are the mighty U.S.S. Enterprise. If you do not change course, we will destroy you—guaranteed.”
The message came back: “We are the lighthouse. Your choice.”
Too often, we want others to change when it is up to us to change our course—or more to the point, to resolve a dispute.
Tip: Reflect on what YOU can do so neither side loses and both sides win.