Take a moment to think about a time when you were successful in getting something you really wanted from someone. Did you tell the person you wanted it, or did you ask? When we want something that is really important to us, we know better than to tell; it sounds too demanding. This is precisely why telling children to do something rarely works.
Limiting your telling requires constant attention. The tendency to tell is most easily changed by replacing it with some other approach. Because young people are sensitive about being told what to do, and because parental help is perfectly appropriate, focus on sharing information. Think of your advice as something to inform, to have the … >>>
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