Posts Tagged Modeling Values

Are You Sending Mixed Messages to Your Child or Teen?

We all want to raise responsible children, but many parents often send mixed messages to their child or teen. This creates confusion about what the expected behaviors and actions really are. The misunderstanding occurs because what the parent says to do and what the parent actually does are quite different.

One of the keys to effective parenting is to know the difference between implicit and explicit modeling and how you do both each day. The fact is that parents are the first teachers. Parents are always modeling how to behave. What are you modeling and are you sending mixed messages?

Examples of Mixed Messages

The following examples from the book Parenting Without Stress demonstrate the difference between explicit and implicit … >>>


Modeling Choice

Many years ago, a reader from Australia sent me the following note:

If we want kids to be caring, honest, generous, and responsible, we have to be caring, honest, generous, and responsible ourselves. As has been said, “Modeling is not just a way to teach; it is the only way to teach.”

Choice is essential to the teaching and learning of values. You cannot mandate generosity, caring, responsibility, honesty, etc. These values can only be promoted in an environment of choice.

You can only show honesty, caring, responsibility, etc. when you can choose not to behave in these ways. Many kids these days have huge amounts of freedom, but they do not have the responsible behavior to handle their freedom.… >>>