Assumptions, Self-talk, and Emotions

Relationships can come with disappointments.

Suppose for example that as a subscriber you are inspired to write me prompted by something I wrote. Suppose also that I did not respond when you expected a response. Your natural reaction to my non-response is a “turn-off” towards me.

Cognition and emotion are so integrated in the functioning of the brain that they cannot be separated. Cognition prompts emotion, and here is a simple example. My lack of a response prompts a negative emotion that generates negative thoughts about the “total me.” I am “written off.”

It is possible that I never received the e-mail—that it is out in the Ethernet someplace, that my filters considered it spam because of the title the writer put on the subject line, or perhaps the subject line was left blank and one of my filters categorized it as spam.

Just choosing to change your thoughts and reflect on what is positive about the person can immediately put a negative emotion in proper perspective.

If you dismiss people who disappoint you, the loss may be yours.