Language helps shape behavior.
Give young children a cookie and say to them, “I will return in a few minutes and will give you something else if you haven’t eaten the cookie until I return. ” If you were to watch the young ones through an observation window, you would see some youngsters talking to themselves attempting to control their impulses. Those without language skills will be seen making all kinds of contortions and movements in attempts to control themselves.
Control is easier with appropriate language.
In his classic, futuristic novel, “1984, ” George Orwell makes the point that language shapes thinking. If there were no word for freedom, the concept would be difficult to communicate. Language not only assists communication, it helps shape it.
Saying, “I am angry” communicates a state of being. In contrast, as soon as we phrase the emotion as an action such as, “I am angering,” we immediately become aware of a choice. Changing the adjective to a verbal form empowers you to choose your response to an emotion.
Become more aware of the words you use because they have an effect on your behavior AND your feelings.