Stop Enforcing Rules

If a child breaks a rule, what is the parent or teacher’s natural tendency? To enforce the rule and dish out consequences (discipline) as a result of that rule being broken.

But if a child doesn’t follow a procedure, what is the adult’s natural tendency? To teach that procedure—to restate it, to seek understanding, to coach, to correct.

That’s a big difference.

Unfortunately, too many parents and teachers today are relying on rules rather than teaching procedures, and as a result they’re making their parenting and/or teaching journey much more difficult and stressful.

If your objective is to empower children, to motivate them to put forth effort in their learning, and to have them want to behave responsibly, referring to rules is counterproductive.

Rules impose. Procedures empower.

See more in this short video here. I’d love to hear your comments on this topic.