Posts Tagged Promote Responsible Behavior

Consulting, Discipline, and Relationships

When most people think of “consulting,” they envision a business scenario—something very corporate. But did you know that consulting can help on a personal level too, especially in terms of discipline and relationships?

After recently presenting to a number businesses, schools, and parent groups and listening to so many complaints, I feel an obligation to offer a consulting service to teachers, parents, and/or leaders in any occupation or industry who would like to reduce stress, promote responsible behavior, improve relationships, promote learning, and/or receive more joy in parenting.

Think of this as a way to tap into my years of wisdom on a one-to-to level and get customized advice and strategies based on your unique situation. Do you have a … >>>

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Responsibility and Choice

Social scientists have determined that we accept inner responsibility for a behavior when we think we have chosen to perform it in the absence of outside pressure, such as a large reward.

The incentive or reward may get us to perform a certain action, but it won’t get us to accept inner responsibility for the act. Consequently, we won’t feel committed to it. The same is true of a strong threat; it may motivate immediate compliance, but it is unlikely to produce long-term commitment.

These conclusions have important implications for parents and teachers. It suggests that we should not use bribes (rewards) or threats (punishment) to discipline children or coerce them to do the things we want them to do. … >>>

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Top 10 Problems with Using Imposed Punishments as Discipline

A common myth is that imposed punishments are necessary to change young people’s behavior. In reality, imposed punishment comes out of our desire to control. In contrast, when the desire is to teach and raise responsible citizens, teaching and guidance prevail.

Despite succeeding in stopping irresponsible behavior in some cases, imposed punishments are ineffective with far too many young people as a method for helping them make lasting changes in their behavior. In fact, here are the top 10 problems with using imposed punishments as discipline:

Imposed punishments…

  1. Are temporary
  2. Are adult-dependent rather than self-dependent
  3. Are inconsistently applied
  4. Are based on avoidance
  5. Lose their effectiveness over time
  6. Do nothing to help a young person learn to modify irresponsible behavior
  7. Foster
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