Promoting Responsibility & Learning – Volume 15 Number 5
#3 Example of a quality question
#4 Improving relationships with a partner
#5 The Zeigarnik Principle and curiosity
Archive
If you reflect on your self-talk, you will conclude that your thoughts often involve past experiences or future visions. However, what you are choosing to do in the present is often done nonconsciously. Taking action is a current activity—not a past or future one. In addition, action requires more than thought. For example, if there are three frogs on a lily pond and one decides to jump, you may conclude—in error—that there would be two frogs left. However, deciding to jump is not the same as jumping. In this situation, three frogs would still be left. More than thinking about the past or the future, it is taking action in the present that leads to responsible behavior.
READ MORE >>> →To truly teach someone something, you need to do more than just recite information. Any parent or teacher instinctively knows this. Yet, many still struggle with getting their children and students to put forth the effort to actually learn something new. Here’s the best way to increase learning. When you present something, follow this teaching formula: WHAT it is you will explain.WHY it is important to know about it.HOW the listener can use it.Give an EXAMPLE of how it works. The more you use this simple approach, the more that your children and students will be motivated to put forth the effort to learn what you are teaching.
READ MORE >>> →Why start the morning as a “downer” when you can start your day in a positive, pleasant way! Here is a little procedure you can use. Get up 20 minutes earlier than you need to do. Before turning on the TV, reading your email, or browsing the news sites—all of which can be full of discouraging news—read something uplifting. The positive energy engendered will carry you through the day so that any situation you encounter can be handled more easily. Simply by being uplifted in the morning, you will find it easier to enjoy your entire day.
READ MORE >>> →Curriculum, Instruction, Classroom Management, and Discipline
Join successful teachers who understand the differences to pinpoint a problem.
Homework is a hot topic for teachers. In fact, I get asked about this topic several times each week. The most common question is, “How do you encourage kids to do homework?” Many teachers reveal that they feel as if they are constantly chasing after students to do it. Additionally, they think it’s a reflection of their teaching if student don’t put forth the effort into doing homework. In order to differentiate between EFFORT in EMPLOYMENT and EFFORT in LEARNING, I avoid the use of the word, “work.” Rather than referring to homeWORK, I refer to home assignments. And the only reflection on your teaching should be to ask yourself whether or not the assignments are relevant, meaningful, and/or useful.
READ MORE >>> →There are emotional challenges that all of us have, even children. One of the challenges pertains to worrying about the future. Worry is fear of the unknown. Even more important to realize is that worry is actually negative self-talk. Additionally, if you reflect on the things that you have worried about, you will conclude that they rarely occurred in reality. As with worry, some people live with past failures, with past hurts, and thereby bring past negative emotions into the present. One of the keys to happiness is to practice thinking in the present rather than dwelling on the worry of the future or negativity of the past. Controlling your thoughts to stay in the present by redirecting negative thoughts
READ MORE >>> →This country has a serious dropout problem. Every year, over 1.2 million students drop out of high school in the United States alone. That’s one student every 26 seconds, or 7,000 a day. Not returning to school is not an event; it is a process. Show me a school dropout, and I’ll show you a young person who has not established positive relationships at school. Many dropouts start negative self-talk early in their school careers. I submit that this negative approach has many causes—among which are (1) using competition (rather than collaboration) and (2) emphasizing what is wrong (rather than first pointing out positives and, thereby, fostering encouragement). However, the desire to belong is so strong in young humans that
READ MORE >>> →Parents and teachers often want to know, “How can I get my children/students to try harder?” The answer is simple: ask them. The best question to ask is: “Can you do better?” This question will prompt students to increase their effort and improve their quality of work. Asked by parents, this question will prompt their children to reflect on their behavior. But it goes way beyond the classroom and home front. You can use this question in everyday interactions too. For example, asked by you at a hotel registration desk may often result in an upgraded room. The same works with rental car agencies and people working on commission. And don’t forget the most important person to ask: YOU! “Can
READ MORE >>> →A teacher recounted one of her tough discipline experiences: She asked a misbehaving student (middle school) on which level he was choosing to behave, and he answered, “On a lower level.” The student did this a few more times, so the teacher gave him the reflection form. But even after filling it out, the student still operated at a low level. The teacher, extremely frustrated at this point, didn’t know what to do except give the student a detention (imposed discipline). She came to me wondering what she should do next time this occurred. Following is my reply. Think “Elicit” rather than “Impose.” After the student has acknowledged lower level behavior and continues to act on level B, ask the
READ MORE >>> →If you want to help your students improve their performance (and also improve your own), make these questions a part of your classroom culture. Create (or have a student create) a large poster with the following questions clearly visible: 1. What am I learning? 2. How am I learning? 3. Why am I learning? 4. Who am I becoming? Primary students can share their responses with each other. Older students can reflect on the lesson/day in their journals. Create a small poster for yourself, too. A pocket-size card will do. Place these questions on the card for a morning glance:1. What am I doing to start my day in a positive way?2. What do I get to do today? Place
READ MORE >>> →Promoting Responsibility & Learning – Volume 15 Number 4
#2 Earning vs. Entitlement
#4 How Not to say “No” without saying “No”
#5 LA Lesson from Socrates
Giving three options works wonders in just about any situation. For example, let’s assume your airline flight has been delayed and you finally get to your hotel room at midnight. But because it is so late, the hotel clerk informs you that your hotel room has been given to another guest. Rather than get angry, tell the clerk that the hotel has three options: (1) give you one of the suites they reserve for their special guests at the rate originally given you, (2) pay for the transportation AND room charges for another hotel that they arrange, or (3) call the general manager of the hotel. The result: You will be given one of the hotel’s special rooms for the
READ MORE >>> →Here are some advanced concepts for using the Raise Responsibility System (RRSystem) for discipline, for encouragement, and for promoting learning and academic achievement. RRSystem for Discipline: After teachers are well into the mode of ASKING students (instead of telling them) to identify a level of chosen behavior, asking for a response may seem coercive. At this point, teachers can then shift to SUGGESTING that students SIMPLY REFLECT on their chosen level. Remember that the hierarchy is NOT an assessment tool for someone on the outside looking in. Also understand that no one can know the motivation of another person with complete accuracy, and since rewards can change motivation, rewarding Level D behavior can be counterproductive. The reward-giver will never know
READ MORE >>> →Is there an appropriate time to use a “perk” as a motivator? Certainly! But realize that the underlying drive is often not the perk but the competition. Just look at the Olympic Games. Competition and recognition are basic to humankind. In my own case, I play the classic music of the Great Highland Bagpipe called piobaireachd (pronounced pibroch). Approximately eight percent of pipers play this type of music, and this traditional music never would have been passed on to today without competitions. The token ribbons won were nice, but it was the competitive spirit that had me devote hundreds of hours to practicing. The mistake erupts when, by implication, we use rewards to promote learning. If a youngster is never
READ MORE >>> →Is public recognition for good behavior or attitudes a good practice? Not in my opinion! I expect good behavior, and I don’t know how to assess one’s attitude aside from one’s behavior. As I have stated in many times in the past, the problem with rewards is that the reward-giver will never know in the future whether the person is acting on Level D because it is the right thing to do OR simply to get the reward. REWARDING young people for EXPECTED STANDARDS OF APPROPRIATE BEHAVIOR takes youth on a treacherous path—even though thousands of teachers and parents do it. This practice is highly counterproductive to their ultimate goals and is contributing to raising a generation of young people
READ MORE >>> →Teachers often ask me how they can convince students to do their homework. Many reveal that they have several students who don’t care about homework and refuse to do it. When it comes to homework, remember that you cannot force learning. In fact, there are thousands of capable, mature, responsible adults who rarely did their homework in school. As I mention in my book Discipline Without Stress, I do not use the term, “homework.” I differentiate between work and effort. I use the term, “home assignment.” So the question teachers are really asking me is: “How can I get students to put forward the effort to do what I assign them to do?” The answer starts with the teacher. What
READ MORE >>> →Just as young children don’t want to be carried while they are learning to walk, adolescents don’t want adults making decisions for them. In fact, the more the adult tries to exert control over the youth, the more the adolescent will resist, resulting in increased discipline challenges. Remember, the only way a child can learn to walk is to practice walking. Similarly, the only way to help youth develop responsible behavior is to allow them to practice decision-making. Each time you make a decision for another person, you deprive that person of an opportunity for maturity and responsibility. Will you agree with every decision the youth makes? Probably not. But without the opportunity to practice making their own decisions, adolescents
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