Effectiveness

Whenever something new is introduced, plan to thoroughly teach carefully the procedures—not just once or twice but at least a few times. Every detail is demonstrated and includes, for example, what to do in the cafeteria with dirty spoons, plastic containers, juice boxes, straws and garbage after snack or lunch time. Kerry has her students practice each procedure at least at least eight times. She actually moves the kids around the room after snack time eight times and has them sit on the floor at the back sink and near the cloakroom where the garbage and juice box containers are located in order to have students experience the procedures that she wants them to follow.

She does the same for … >>>

We often want to assist people by telling them what to avoid. Upon analysis, you will discover that so often when you tell a person what to avoid, the opposite results. The reason is that the brain does not envision "don't" or any other negative-type word. The brain envisions pictures, illusions, visions, and images.

Here is an example: Don't think of the color blue. What color did your brain envision?

Here is another example:
Think of any house pet—except a little white kitten with a bright red bow around its neck.

The park sign, "Don't walk on the grass" is less effective than "Please use walkways."

The teacher who tells the student not to look at his neighbor's paper is … >>>

Responsible people are happy people.
Happy people are responsible people.
Responsibility and happiness feed on each other.

Dr. Jim Sutton expanded on this concept when he wrote in his blog:

Dr. Marvin Marshall (www.marvinmarshall.com), my friend in California and founder of the acclaimed “Discipline Without Stress” ‘program, suggests young people sometimes misbehave for two clear and addressable reasons:
1. They are unhappy.
2. Their behavior is their attempt to “fix” the problem.

We best not lose the message of these two statements in their simplicity. They come very, very close to saying all we need to know about behavior in children and adolescents. Unfortunately, it is often the case that we consider neither of these reasons in working … >>>

I had the pleasure of presenting at the William Glasser Institute’s International Convention in Jersey City, New Jersey.

Dr. Glasser is a psychiatrist whose first contribution was REALITY THERAPY, one of the earliest of what is now referred to as “cognitive psychology.” He then started working with schools and made perhaps his most significant contribution to the field of education when he introduced CLASSROOM MEETINGS. He then extended his ideas by developing “CHOICE THEORY” (originally referred to as “Control Theory), which basically proposes that all we can do is control ourselves by the choices we make. From W.Edwards Deming, Dr. Glasser introduced “LEAD MANAGEMENT” (vs. “Boss Management”). His current thrust is to bring achieving MENTAL HEALTH to the general public.… >>>

Here is an interesting e-mail I received that deserves sharing:

I teach in a school in Sydney, Australia. I recently did a course in Choice Theory and saw your book at the course. Having read it, I decided I would try to implement your ideas. I was also curious to find out more and discovered your site when I did a search. Although I am still a novice, I can say that your system does work, and for the first time this year one of my most difficult classes has finally settled down and there is real learning happening.

Mersina

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Note: “Choice Theory” is a registered trademark of the William Glasser Institute. It is the basis for training in … >>>

I had the distinct pleasure of celebrating and speaking with Emery Stoops, a former professor of mine at the University of Southern California, who celebrated the 103rd anniversary of his birth.

Phi Delta Kappa International republished his “Psychology of Success: Develop Your Hidden Powers,” which they first published in 1983 when Emery was a youthful 86.

Here is a checklist from the book that Dr. Stoops entitled, “GRADE YOUR HABITS.” His page is divided into columns—the first is the habit and the second gives the reader an opportunity to self-grade: F, D, C, B, A.

Here are the habits:
1. Starting early
2. Enjoying your work
3. Believing in your ability
4. Scheduling time and place for work at home… >>>

One of the great approaches to successful living is to develop the art of prompting positive mindsets.

For example, suppose I lay a plank on the ground. Almost anyone could easily walk on the plank from one end to the other. But if I were to raise the plank 20 feet off the ground, how many people do you think would get across it without falling? I would guess quite a few people would fall off the plank.

Why can people walk the plank when it’s on the ground but not while it’s elevated? A prime reason is that when the plank is on the ground, people imagine success. They believe and feel they can accomplish the task. Off the … >>>

At a conference of the Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development (ASCD), a high school principal commented to me as he pointed to hundreds of exhibits of books, technology, and teaching materials around the vast exhibit hall, "None of these address the first and most critical component of classroom teaching: CONNECTING!"
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Gordon Neufeld, a Vancouver, Canada based clinical psychologist directly addresses this concept. He speaks about attachment and its necessity for young people to feel attached until they are able to function independently.

Since attachment facilitates dependence, I prefer to use the term "connectedness."

Dr. Neufeld cites an interesting procedure many teachers and parents use with young people. It's called "time-out." He makes the point that this approach sends … >>>

A student teacher at Humboldt State University in Northern California asked me at a conference to sign her book and to please include "WWMMD." I obliged and then asked her what "WWMMD" meant. She told me that whenever her college instructor—Mary Lynn Bryan, a National Board Certified Teacher— gives a scenario about a school situation, she has the students respond by first asking
themselves ,"WWMMD?"

Translation: What Would Marvin Marshall Do?

I was rather taken aback. After reflecting on the possible efficacy of the phrase, I thought to ask our daughter about it. She is a social worker who counsels teenagers and is also certified by the William Glasser Institute in Reality Therapy and Choice Theory. I asked,

"Hillary, if … >>>

One of the fundamental truths I remember from my graduate studies in economics is the concept of opportunity costs. This means there is a cost to everything—be it in monetary terms, in time, in relationships—really in anything.

The Nobel Laureate, Milton Freedman, summarized economics with the same idea: “There is no such thing as a free lunch.”

Here is a challenge. For the next week, ask yourself the following question before taking any action: “WHAT PRICE WILL I BE PAYING?”

Situations can include:
Going to bed late
Going to bed early

Arising late
Arising early

Watching TV
Reading a book

Eating that second piece of pie
Not tempting the taste by not eating the first piece

Demanding something
Asking for … >>>

An 80-year-old woman was unable to find a cab to take her home. She walked into a pizza parlor and said, “I’d like to order a pepperoni pizza delivered…and I’d like to go with it.”

People say about the aging process that it critical to retain our humor as we grow older. The reason is that, as we grow, our character traits become more ingrained. In fact, they become even more pronounced. A sweet person becomes sweeter. A disagreeable person becomes a real crank in old age.

Therefore, the attitudes and traits we are planting now will take root and become rigid habits later in life. So it’s important to make a commitment to live a daily life of good … >>>

Recently during my flight to present “How to Deal with Difficult Students,” an airline attendant asked me if my name was Marvin Marshall.

Since I was not wearing a name tag, I inquired of Janet (not her real name) how she knew who I was. She whispered to me that she is leaving the airline industry to enter teaching. She said that she is reading my book for the SECOND time before lending the book to her sister who is having a challenging time with her two children.

I inquired how she found out about the book. She said that one of her professors at the university she is attending mentioned that the book was one of his favorites. She … >>>

Remove barriers to achieve goals—rather than pressure people to achieve them.

When leaders are not happy with people who report to them, there is a tendency to add pressure.

Instead of adding pressure, a more successful approach is to ask what are the barriers that are keeping people from doing their best.

We may not be able to remove government and other imposed barriers. However, we can inquire what is within our control that may be hampering others from doing their best.

Leaders, teachers, and parents can use the same approach with young people by asking, "What can I can do to remove barriers preventing you from doing your best?

More information on this topic is available at http://marvinmarshall.com.… >>>

A friend of ours had surgery and expressed her concern about the procedure—even though it was a minor one.

My wife counseled her with the following message:

“When I was pregnant, I never worried about the baby. I simply remembered my mother’s self-talk when she was pregnant: I will only think beautiful thoughts so that I will have a beautiful baby.”

If you have trouble creating self-talk that enhances your life, here is another approach: Redirect or detour your thinking onto another subject.

Do this each time you begin to worry or are creating negative self-talk about yourself or others.

More information on this topic is available at http://marvinmarshall.com.… >>>

When travelling to South Africa with a group of school administrators, I personally experienced the power of how our thinking controls our feelings.

I was chosen as one of two among 35 delegates to make a presentation. Due to various stories of lost and poor handling of luggage in Johannesburg, the group was discouraged from checking in any suitcases. It was suggested to travel only with carry-on luggage. This meant that I could bring a minimum of handouts. The one I chose was my teaching model.

After my presentation, an administrator told me that it was unprofessional to attempt to sell my program.

My website is loaded with information, all of which is FREE—with the exception of my book, … >>>

After presenting in Adelaide, Australia (a lovely and very enjoyable city), I went shopping with my wife. Fortunately, as you will read, I forgot to bring a book.

While waiting for my wife, I spotted a bookstore and purchased a copy of Dale Carnegie’s “HOW TO WIN FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE.” Originally published in 1936, the book went on to become one of the best-selling books of all time and made Carnegie an international celebrity.

His book was used as the text in my first college speech course, and because it had been years since I first read it, I decided to re-read it.

Carnegie had a gift for expressing profound truths in simple but profound ways. A perfect example … >>>

VERBAL messages are only one means of communicating.

MOVEMENT is another. For example, choose one place in your classroom where you will stand when you plan to admonish the class. (The same procedure works in the home, too.)

Before saying anything, wait until you move to that one specific location. Young people are very perceptive. When you start walking to that pre-selected location, the class will immediately settle down. Reason: They antipcate what’s coming.

GESTURES are another means of communication. An example was posted at
DisciplineWithoutStress@yahoogroups.com:

I introduce the Hierarchy of Social Development using charts I made downloaded from the web:
Primary Poster and posters.

I demonstrate the “picking up trash” example from the book. My students seem … >>>

ASSUMPTION is the cause of much NEGATIVITY.

Following is an example of negative emotions PROMPTED BY AN ASSUMPTION.

Suppose your supervisor asks you to stop in the office before leaving for the day. When I recently mentioned this scenario at a presentation, I heard a great groan. Then I made the point: You assumed that the conversation would be negative. You didn’t know that; you just assumed it.

This negative assumption may be natural, but it’s not inevitable. You have a choice regarding your self-talk. You don’t have to ASSUME the situation would have been a negative one. Just hold it in abeyance by redirecting your thoughts. Why prompt negative feeling when it is not necessary? As I clearly demonstrate … >>>