Posts at the mailring: QUESTION: I received my "Discipline Without Stress" book and started introducing the levels and changing my behaviors. My question is how do I set everything up for the beginning of the year? What do I communicate to parents? I have to turn in a class discipline plan to my principal. What would it look like on paper? I usually send this same plan home to parents. Before I have always had the standard (1) warning, (2) 5 minutes time out, (3) 15-minute time out, (4) note home, and (5) trip to office. Very concrete, easy for principal and parents to understand, but it did not work. RESPONSE: The book has excellent forms in the back that
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QUESTION: Although I use Marshall’s Levels of Development, I’m a bit put off by the “reverse A-D system,” with D being the best. It goes opposite to how we typically think of grades or levels. I’ve finally come up with my own labels. I think they have the same meaning but in reverse order. Any comments? Lowest Level D = Deliberate misbehavior Level C = Can’t control self Level B = Behaves for rewards Highest Level A = Automatic self-control RESPONSE: As you implied, the key to success with this approach lies in conveying the understandings of the concepts at each level. The specific name attached to each level is not as important as the concepts that describe and give meaning
READ MORE >>> →: If you deal with young people at all, make time to read the following in its entirety. It is only slightly edited from the original post/ ———– ORIGINAL POST QUESTION: You work with older alternative students as well as with young children. Can you explain the difference between working with them? ———– RESPONSE: I’d love to tell you a bit about the new job that Darlene and I took on. Although in this particular job we make great use of the three principles of positivity, choice, reflection, we aren’t using the program to handle discipline problems in the same way as we do with our primary students. I’ll have to describe the job, the students, and the school to
READ MORE >>> →QUESTION: I am still waiting for my Discipline without Stress book to arrive, but this morning I introduced the system to my class anyway. Even though it’s almost the end of the year, I have such big behavior problems that I decided I had nothing to lose and everything to gain! However, I must have done something wrong because the very students who need this system most, were the ones who didn’t pay attention to the discussion and mocked the levels right from the very start. Any suggestions for making this system real to kids who don’t pay much attention to things like this? RESPONSE: Here is an example of just one small discussion I have had with my own
READ MORE >>> →Responsible people are happy people. Happy people are responsible people. Responsibility and happiness feed on each other. Dr. Jim Sutton expanded on this concept when he wrote in his blog: Dr. Marvin Marshall (www.marvinmarshall.com), my friend in California and founder of the acclaimed “Discipline Without Stress” ‘program, suggests young people sometimes misbehave for two clear and addressable reasons: 1. They are unhappy. 2. Their behavior is their attempt to “fix” the problem. We best not lose the message of these two statements in their simplicity. They come very, very close to saying all we need to know about behavior in children and adolescents. Unfortunately, it is often the case that we consider neither of these reasons in working with the
READ MORE >>> →Dad, can I speak to you about something?” asked Tom. “Let me guess. You want to borrow the car?” his dad joked. “No, it’s nothing like that. It’s about Jim and something that happened at school today.” “Isn’t Jim that kid on the track team with you?” “Yeah.” “You two are pretty good friends, aren’t you?” “Well, that’s what I want to talk to you about. You see, there’s another guy on the team named Eric who got into a fight with Jim after practice. I tried to break it up, but the coach pulled all three of us aside. I told the coach that I was only trying to keep the peace, but then I defended Jim.” Suddenly Tom
READ MORE >>> →I had the pleasure of presenting at the William Glasser Institute’s International Convention in Jersey City, New Jersey. Dr. Glasser is a psychiatrist whose first contribution was REALITY THERAPY, one of the earliest of what is now referred to as “cognitive psychology.” He then started working with schools and made perhaps his most significant contribution to the field of education when he introduced CLASSROOM MEETINGS. He then extended his ideas by developing “CHOICE THEORY” (originally referred to as “Control Theory), which basically proposes that all we can do is control ourselves by the choices we make. From W.Edwards Deming, Dr. Glasser introduced “LEAD MANAGEMENT” (vs. “Boss Management”). His current thrust is to bring achieving MENTAL HEALTH to the general public.
READ MORE >>> →I was asked what sets my discipline approach apart from others. Without hesitation, I said, “The leve and self-monitoring.” The next question came, “Whose hierarchy?” I responded, “Mine.” “Do you refer to it as ‘My Hierarchy’ and, if not, what do you call it?” I responded, “The Levels of Development.” The conversation concluded with the question, “Since it is YOUR hierarchy, then why don’t you call it the ‘Marshall Hierarchy’?” I pondered the question and concluded that when I refer to other hierarchies, I refer to them preceded by the name associated with each, viz., Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, Jean Piaget’s hierarchy of cognitive development, and Lawrence Kohlberg’s hierarchy of moral development. Perhaps reference to the Marvin Marshall Hierarchy
READ MORE >>> →Here is an interesting e-mail I received that deserves sharing: I teach in a school in Sydney, Australia. I recently did a course in Choice Theory and saw your book at the course. Having read it, I decided I would try to implement your ideas. I was also curious to find out more and discovered your site when I did a search. Although I am still a novice, I can say that your system does work, and for the first time this year one of my most difficult classes has finally settled down and there is real learning happening. Mersina ———– Note: “Choice Theory” is a registered trademark of the William Glasser Institute. It is the basis for training in
READ MORE >>> →First Question: When introducing the Levels of Development, I assume that I should focus on one level at a time. Do I start with Level A or Level D? Response: To me, it makes sense to begin with Level A and end with D; I want to end on a positive and inspiring note! Second Question: Would it be best to introduce one new level each week, or one new level each day, while revisiting the previous levels? Response: There are many ways to introduce the Levels of Development. The number of lessons used for introducing the four levels would depend on your own preference and might vary with the age of your students. High school teachers typically introduce all the
READ MORE >>> →Discipline Without Stress (DWS) uses no coercion of any kind. This does not mean that the approach is permissive, “soft,” or lacks authority. The message is that, one way or another, DWS will help young people help themselves to become more responsible, more successful, and more pleased with themselves. IRRESPONSIBLE BEHAVIOR IS AN INDICATION OF NOT BEING HAPPY. Irresponsible behavior is also an indication of not feeling successful. POOR BEHAVIOR IS AN ATTEMPT TO SATISFY A PROBLEM. The DWS approachis is o help the student using the Discipline Without Stress Teaching Model.
READ MORE >>> →QUESTION: I believe in the Discipline Wihout Stress approach, but what should I do with the students who prompt me to yearn for that ditch digging job that I hated as a kid? RESPONSE: 1. Revisit the impulse management link. You may even want to copy and learn the dialog. Continue to repeat the mantra, “Do you want to remain a victim?” If the procedure established was not effective, then repeat the conversation, “Let’s try another procedure so that you will not continue to be a victim of your impulses.” 2. Re-read “Solving Circles” on pages 156-157 in the book. Select that student as one of the participants and yourself as the other. 3. Ask for help. Even Machiavelli wrote
READ MORE >>> →When turtles are born, they know everything they need to know to live for 50 or so years. Since learning is one of the joys of living, I don't think turtles have very much fun. Learning brings growth, and both the process and result of learning can be enjoyable. Watch anyone at any age who is involved in any mental activity for any length of time and ask the person the reason for the involvement. The response will inevitably include the fun factor. A characteristic of successful leaders, teachers, and parents is that they make learning enjoyable; they make it fun. On the other hand, think of someone who has given up learning because, like the turtle, the person already
READ MORE >>> →If you ask yourself how you know someone cares for you, one of your responses is likely to be that you know because the person listens to you. Ask a husband about a good wife, and he is likely to say that he knows his wife cares for him because she listens to what he has to say. Ask a wife about a good husband, and she’ll respond that he listens to her. When the parent says, “It’s about time you started listening to me,” the youngster may be thinking, “It’s about time you started listening to me.” Even if we are saying something that is not really worth listening to, we still want someone to listen to us. Ask
READ MORE >>> →I had the distinct pleasure of celebrating and speaking with Emery Stoops, a former professor of mine at the University of Southern California, who celebrated the 103rd anniversary of his birth. Phi Delta Kappa International republished his “Psychology of Success: Develop Your Hidden Powers,” which they first published in 1983 when Emery was a youthful 86. Here is a checklist from the book that Dr. Stoops entitled, “GRADE YOUR HABITS.” His page is divided into columns—the first is the habit and the second gives the reader an opportunity to self-grade: F, D, C, B, A. Here are the habits: 1. Starting early 2. Enjoying your work 3. Believing in your ability 4. Scheduling time and place for work at home
READ MORE >>> →Promoting Responsibility & Learning – Volume 8 Number 6
#1 10 Counterproductive practices
#3 Smile exercise
#5 Normative testing
Until the 1960’s, school books were replete with vocabulary words like integrity, industry, work, diligence, perseverance, self-reliance, self-examination, honesty, character, and responsibility. There was a glorification of hard work and an emphasis on education and self-discipline. Assuming that textbooks have an influence on curriculum and instruction and that they, therefore, have an effect on children’s behavior and character, perhaps it is time to re-examine the contents of our school books as well as the vocabulary we use. In his classic book, “1984,” George Orwell demonstrated the power of words with the example of the term “freedom.” If there were no such term, how would the concept be imagined, envisioned, and communicated? When we use the word in conversations with the
READ MORE >>> →Kerry Weisner, the writer of Discipline Answers, notes that the only thing that she has often seen schools do with the Virtue Project that would not fit with the Discipline Without Stress approach is rewarding students for displaying various virtues—in other words, using the old “catch them being good” behaviour modification ploy. As an example, I have noticed many schools offer raffle tickets to students who display kindness during “Kindness Month” or who are helpful during “Helpfulness Month,” thereby unwittingly encouraging operation on Level C. To me, it seems that such schools are missing out on a wonderful opportunity to help young people become aware of the benefits of operating on the highest level of all—Level D—the level at which
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