Posts Tagged Self-Reflection

Make Time for Self-Reflection

Do you schedule self-reflection time into your day? Most people do not. However, if you want to reduce your stress, increases your focus, and develop the mindset to create your ideal life, making time for self-reflection is key.

Think of living your life like an artist painting a picture. An artist cannot be continually wielding the paintbrush. The painter must stop at times to step back, reflect on their work, and freshen their vision of the painting. Without this crucial step, the artist will never be able to express their full vision on the canvas.

In this way, living is also an art. We can’t become so absorbed in life’s technical process—the day-to-day tasks—that we lose sight of our general … >>>


Develop the Habit of Self-Reflection

Self-reflection is a vital success habit. When you develop your skill of asking reflective questions—those that foster self-evaluation—you can see problems in a new light, become more proactive, and ultimately reduce stress.

Even better is to foster this skill in others, including your children, teammates, and employees. You will empower others when you help them develop this skill. The dynamic behind asking reflective questions is that it encourages ownership because people don’t argue with their own viewpoints.

Here are some suggestions for asking effective reflective questions that encourage self-reflection:

  • Focus on the present or future—as opposed to the past. What’s done is done and dwelling on it won’t help anyone. Instead, keep focused on what you can do
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The Most Important Question to Ask Yourself

If there were one key question to ask yourself to gauge your relationships and your effectiveness, what do you think it would be? How can you really know how others view you? How can you know that you’re being the best person you can possibly be?

Self-evaluation is critical for personal growth. After all, you can’t improve unless you know what to improve upon. This is true for all aspects of life, whether on the job or within your family. Of course, self-reflection and self-assessment can be difficult. Libraries are filled with hundreds of books on the topic, each offering their own version of how to do it effectively.

But what if there were a simpler way? A single question … >>>


Self-Reflection and Effectiveness

A school principal contacted me for advice. He was trying to put together a way for the teachers at his school to reflect on their year and to self-evaluate. He wanted it to be something that was do-able, that wouldn’t feel overwhelming in its scope or the time it would take for them to complete, and that would feel meaningful and help guide their work for next year.

My suggestion was this: Pose the following question to your teachers. “If I were a student, would I want me as a teacher? If yes, list the reasons. If no, list the reasons.

Of course, this question isn’t just for teachers. You can reframe it for any situation or relationship, as in:… >>>


Develop the Discipline to NOT Help

We all want to help others in need, especially when the person in need is a child. But sometimes, the best way to help people is to stop helping them.

Of course, not helping someone is difficult. Teachers and parents, by nature, are helpers. They don’t want to see children struggle. However, rather than do the task for the other person, have the discipline to back off. A simple question like, “Well, what do you think about that?” or “What do you think we should do?” or “What would you like to see happen?” prompts the person to reflect, entices a solution to a challenge, and even encourages self-discipline.

If you think about it, this approach makes sense. It’s something … >>>


Reflective Questions worth Memorizing

Throughout this blog you’ll find many discussions about the power and importance of using reflective questions with children. Of course, knowing why something is vital is much different than knowing how to implement it. Therefore, below is a list of some reflective questions worth memorizing. To make it easier, I’ve categorized the questions so you can see which situations they work best in. I suggest everyone memorize these questions. As you practice using reflective questions and try out new ones on your children or students, add them to your own list.

For Getting On Task

  • Does what you are doing help you get your work done?
  • If you would like to get your work done, what would be your first
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Is it possible to use both Discipline without Stress AND tallies?


I have often been tempted to order the Discipline without Stress book. What has held me back is my school’s requirement that we use the same discipline plan throughout the department (in my case, 4th through 6th grades.)

The department has the same rules:  (1) Be respectful (2) Be obedient (3) Be honest (4) Be responsible.After the usual warning, if any rule is violated, a tally is given to the student. The number of tallies for the week determines the child’s behavior grade.  A behavior grade must be given each week.

Here is my question:  Is it feasible to use both this discipline plan and the DWS method or would it be too cumbersome/confusing? The one is mandatory >>>