Here is a marvelously successful idea to stop bullying. The approach can be used to prevent bullying in classrooms, reduce bullying school-wide, and can even stop bullying behaviors in homes. The key is to approach motivation of bullying that prompts people to bully others. Watch Now
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Teachers and parents are always looking for ways to motivate students and children. Whether it’s inspiring them to do their homework or clean their rooms, adults try many different techniques to get the youth to comply. Unfortunately, many adults use external motivators at school and at home. These include telling young people what to do, threatening and punishing them, and rewarding them for things that they should do. These approaches do little to motivate students and children. Rather, they teach young people OBEDIENCE. The shortcomings of obedience appear when teachers and parents are not around to use these EXTERNAL motivators. I created the Levels of Development to help teachers and parents focus on internal motivation. This is important because internal
READ MORE >>> →Positivity is important. And sometimes we need to think of the meaning behind what we like to keep. This applies to both physical and mental keepsakes. Are your thoughts and possessions promoting positivity? Or do you need to let go of some outdated beliefs? Here is a case in point. For years I have had a little statue describing an ancient morality. The tiny statue that sat on my desk portrayed three little monkeys. One had hands over the eyes, another with hands over the ears, and a third with hands over the mouth. The message was to see no evil, hear no evil, and speak no evil. The philosophy portrayed in the little figures is that good is found
READ MORE >>> →The Discipline Without Stress methodology makes classroom discipline much easier. It empowers students through the use and practice of The Levels of Development. Think about what you would do in each of the following scenarios that are typical in a school setting. After, we’ll discuss how Discipline Without Stress makes each incident less stressful. Scenario 1: The school dress code says that students may not wear hats in the building. Your student is refusing to take off his hat. Most teachers say that they have no specific procedure to handle this situation. Scenario 2: A student refuses to hang up his coat in the coat closet. In this situation, many teachers say they would take the coat and hang it
READ MORE >>> →Sneak Peek of this month’s edition: In order to significantly improve relationships, focus on CLARIFICATION, rather than attempting to influence the person. You will find that agreement is often achieved more quickly with this approach. Rather than assuming you know the reasoning behind another person’s viewpoint, ask for an explanation. That is, aim at clarification—rather than influencing. Using this process, the person articulates the reasoning, and you many find that the person’s reasoning is worth considering. Read More
READ MORE >>> →Your words are powerful. In fact, I often say that people do good when they feel good. This is true of adults and children. Children who act on Levels C and D of the Levels of Development chart feel good. While those who act on Levels A and B have more negative feelings. What are you doing to help others do good? Is your language uplifting others? Or are your words bringing people down? Yes, your words are powerful and what you say often has a big impact on others. While many people don’t intentionally say outright mean or nasty things to others, they may use other subtle words or sentence patterns that disempower others. Your Words Matter The great
READ MORE >>> →Most people are on a quest for happiness. We want to be happy, and we want our children to be happy. As a result, to hopefully ensure the happiness of their children, many parents give them things. Before I go any further, let me clearly state that the following point is NOT to stop giving items to our children; it is to point out how HAPPINESS is EARNED, not GIVEN. Unfortunately, many young people today are learning to have an “entitlement” mentality rather than a happiness mentality. For example, many teachers give kindergarten and early grade students stickers or other items for doing what the teacher requests. Parents also bribe youngsters by saying something like, “If you do this, then
READ MORE >>> →We all want our children and students to do well in school. But there is a big difference between memorizing facts and true learning. Unfortunately, because of the proliferation of standardized tests, many students are merely memorizing facts for a short period rather than engaging in real lifelong learning. The good news is that you can help students make meaningful connections between what they study in school and what happens in real life. A good start is to have young people learn the Levels of Development. Here are 5 tips parents and teachers can use to promote learning in today’s youth. 1. Self-testing and asking “Why” questions are excellent ways to improve learning. To see if a student truly understands
READ MORE >>> →Being able to attain your personal definition of success requires many things. When asked, many people cite perseverance as being a key success factor. While perseverance is important, there is something even more vital. More than education, more than experience, more than training, a person’s level of resilience will determine who succeeds and who fails. Resilience is a cousin of perseverance. A person can increase his or her level of resilience, and thereby increase their chances of success, by developing mental and physical habits that foster a positive mental state. How to Develop Your Resilience and Attain Success A body of data, including studies of identical twins, suggests that certain personal characteristics that foster resilience may be at least partly
READ MORE >>> →Focusing on discipline is something parents do every day. But sometimes it seems no matter what you do or say, the children never learn to change their ways. Here’s a secret: Whenever something a child does bothers you, the solution is to teach a procedure. In fact, teaching a procedure is one of the best ways to focus on promoting responsibility. Read More
READ MORE >>> →The Levels of Development primarily explains the difference between external motivation and internal motivation. Although technically all motivation is internal, being able to articulate something outside of ourselves that prompts or motivates will help us make more responsible decisions. Watch Now
READ MORE >>> →Relationship stress is a common problem. The relationship can be between two adults, two children, and even between an adult and a child. The quickest and best way to ease relationship stress is NOT to try to change the other person. Instead, change something about yourself first. If you are convinced that another person is wrong and they are the source of the stress, there is always the chance it could just be a case of “mistaken certainty.” Or, perhaps, the two of you just have significantly different belief systems. Or, perhaps, it could be the case that “I know you believe you think you understand what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what
READ MORE >>> →Focusing on child discipline is something parents and teacher do every day. But sometimes it seems no matter what you do or say, the child never learns to change their ways. Here’s a secret: Whenever something a child does bothers you, whether at home or in the classroom, the solution is to teach a procedure. In fact, teaching a procedure is one of the best ways to focus on child discipline. For example, if students all run to the door at recess, teach a procedure for exiting the classroom. If your child continually leaves their clothes on the floor, teach a procedure for dressing and undressing. You really can teach a procedure for virtually anything. How a Procedure Makes Child
READ MORE >>> →When it comes to motivation, many people believe that internal motivation is the only one that’s important. That’s not necessarily true. Both types help us live our life to the fullest. The Levels of Development highlights both internal and external motivation. And it’s important to realize that we live our lives on all levels of the Levels of Development. Rich Lowry, in his book “Lincoln Unbound” (2013), states that some people convinced Lincoln to run for the Illinois state legislature in 1832. He was just 23 at the time. This was certainly external motivation. I had similar experiences when a colleague suggested I become a high school principal. (At the time, I already had served as a high school assistant
READ MORE >>> →Of all the things that cause stress in people’s lives, relationships rank high on the list. Whether it’s between adults, family, friends, or children, relationship challenges are inevitable. Here are three tips for significantly improving relationships and making them less stressful. 1. Give Affirmations A simple acknowledgement can have dramatic results. This is especially important with young people. They want to assert their independence and autonomy. Just acknowledging that you have HEARD their point of view, regardless of agreement, can have a profound effect on how your growing young one feels about the relationship. 2. Use quality listening time. Quality time is quality-driven, not necessarily quantity-driven. Simply give your full attention to the person speaking. By using eye contact, a
READ MORE >>> →Promoting good behavior is something both teachers and parents want for the children in their lives. And it’s always easier to do when the teachers and parents work together. Following is an email I received from a teacher about students, parents, and good behavior. “I am interested in implementing your ideas in my classroom. They make such sense to me, and I am very excited! What do you recommend for communicating about student behavior with the parents? In previous years I used a behavior classroom chart and a six-weeks calendar where daily behavior is recorded and sent home each day. I do not want to use that system any longer. However, I will have parents who will want to know
READ MORE >>> →EXCERPT FROM THIS MONTH’S EDITION: Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “To know how to suggest is the great art of teaching.” The same holds true for promoting responsibility. This approach was widely used in Native Americans cultures where suggestions for empowerment were commonly used. Rather than a father saying, “You have to do this,” he would often say something like, “Son, some day when you are a man you will do this.” This is a powerful way to encourage, nurture, empower, and establish expectations. Read More
READ MORE >>> →Using positive words may be the most successful approach to reduce stress and increase your effectiveness. The reason is that this type of vocabulary empowers AND feels good. Compare each in the following examples: “I HAVE to go” versus “I GET to go.” “I have no choice” versus “I am choosing to …” “No!” versus “Not yet.” “I only have two choices” versus “I have two choices.” “I have a DEADLINE” versus “I have a DUE date.” (The former connotes DEATH while the latter connotes BIRTH.) We now know scientifically that what Henry Ford stated was accurate: “If you think you can, you can; if you think you can’t, you can’t. Either way you are right.” The words you use
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